Fog

     I was coasting. I was coasting in life.  Going to sleep early and drinking the proper amount of water had paid off.  It wasn't just something for drinking too much on a random weeknight.  Drinking enough water and getting enough sleep had changed my general mindset.  There was minimal fog and even less pain.  It was going to be a good day.  I knew there wasn't much time left at the job so I had to make a decision.

     I decided that they had to fire me.  I wouldn't walk out.  Walking out wouldn't cut it.  I couldn't just quit.  In my mind you don't quit.  You stop doing things that don't work for you.  You refocus your energy on things that move you forward.  You do these things but you don't quit.

     I could have crumbled when they told me that after 10 years I didn't deserve to be there but, I didn't.  I could have broken when they told me that I was (and had always been in their eyes) unfit for the job but, I didn't.

     I realized that these comments were made by a person lashing out and making choices based on fear.  I was ok.  My mind was clear.  The goal was to hold on to the job for as long as I could.  Rather than throw a wrench in the system I would do my best and make it work for me as long as it could.

     Going to sleep early and drinking the proper amount of water had paid off.  There was minimal fog.  Coasting wouldn't cut it any more.  It was time to stop before I ran aground.  The fog was dissipating and the path was becoming clear.