"Seriously?!?" I said face palming myself as the new e-mail appeared in my in box. This was just not my day. It was a long day of wanting to get away but I wasn't getting very far.
Over the years there have been various dating disasters. There was a disaster that involved an adult site. There was a disaster 20 years ago were the girl didn't really want to go on a date with me as much as she needed a ride to the mall to meet the friends who really she really wanted to hang out with. For anyone who is wondering, the singles scene sucks. It is especially bad if you happen to be in your 40's but not for the reasons you think. There are a few ways to attain single status in your 40's.
1. You get divorced and your life kind of falls apart.
2. You lose a spouse through some godforsaken illness or accident.
3. You live a life of relative irresponsibility and wake up to realize Oh Shit, I'm 40!
I fall in the last of the three categories. I do occasionally get the question "Oh I can't believe you're not married. Why didn't you ever get married?" My typical answer tends to be, "Think about all the reasons you told yourself you and I would never work out. You weren't the only one who told themselves that." It is my not so subtle was of saying 'Why the fuck would you ask me that question?' Most of the time I am being asked that question while being told about some marriage/relationship/hookup that has just gone bad.
The thing about being in your 40's is that the dating sphere opens up again. When you're single between 35 and 40 there is a weird lull where people don't really know how to take you. It's like when you hold a baby and you can't tell if the child has had gas or is in need of a full on diaper change. People keep you at arms length. If you're a woman people think of you as desperate and kind of feel sorry for you while at the same time thinking it's your fault. When you're a single male between 35 and 40 you are a player who is almost past his prime. You are the man-child who would be a good catch if he would just grow up.
Women over 40 who are doing well are perceived as cougars. They don't need anything from you. They bat away men in their 20's like children. They vet men in their 30's to make sure they still aren't acting like children and they view single men in their 40's with intense suspicion. As the single male over 40 who has a good job and the ability to maintain yourself you become a person of interest to women in their 40's who are in similar situations. You will become a solid choice for the woman in her late 30's who is going through her first divorce unless she just wants a man who is young, stupid, and built like the Greek god of pleasure. You will be caught off guard by the attraction of women in their 20's with daddy issues. You also become a hot property for today's newest group.
The e-mail just stared at me, begging me to delete it. There was also something tempting me to open it just to see if anyone I knew was a part of this latest, fast growing segment of daters.
Sassy, sexy, senior singles have their eyes on you! When was the last time you were the you were the young man in demand? Don't let their years of experience fade away. Join Senior Singles today!
"Senior Singles, seriously?!?" I said face palming myself.
That Beautiful Black Man
1. You get divorced and your life kind of falls apart.
2. You lose a spouse through some godforsaken illness or accident.
3. You live a life of relative irresponsibility and wake up to realize Oh Shit, I'm 40!
I fall in the last of the three categories. I do occasionally get the question "Oh I can't believe you're not married. Why didn't you ever get married?" My typical answer tends to be, "Think about all the reasons you told yourself you and I would never work out. You weren't the only one who told themselves that." It is my not so subtle was of saying 'Why the fuck would you ask me that question?' Most of the time I am being asked that question while being told about some marriage/relationship/hookup that has just gone bad.
The thing about being in your 40's is that the dating sphere opens up again. When you're single between 35 and 40 there is a weird lull where people don't really know how to take you. It's like when you hold a baby and you can't tell if the child has had gas or is in need of a full on diaper change. People keep you at arms length. If you're a woman people think of you as desperate and kind of feel sorry for you while at the same time thinking it's your fault. When you're a single male between 35 and 40 you are a player who is almost past his prime. You are the man-child who would be a good catch if he would just grow up.
Women over 40 who are doing well are perceived as cougars. They don't need anything from you. They bat away men in their 20's like children. They vet men in their 30's to make sure they still aren't acting like children and they view single men in their 40's with intense suspicion. As the single male over 40 who has a good job and the ability to maintain yourself you become a person of interest to women in their 40's who are in similar situations. You will become a solid choice for the woman in her late 30's who is going through her first divorce unless she just wants a man who is young, stupid, and built like the Greek god of pleasure. You will be caught off guard by the attraction of women in their 20's with daddy issues. You also become a hot property for today's newest group.
The e-mail just stared at me, begging me to delete it. There was also something tempting me to open it just to see if anyone I knew was a part of this latest, fast growing segment of daters.
Sassy, sexy, senior singles have their eyes on you! When was the last time you were the you were the young man in demand? Don't let their years of experience fade away. Join Senior Singles today!
"Senior Singles, seriously?!?" I said face palming myself.
That Beautiful Black Man
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