"I hope you don't mind," she said moving back to her side of the couch.
"I'm fine," I answered waiting for the blood to return to the rest of my body.
"I've never seen anyone react to a no like that before. It was so awesome. Most guys just don't get it. You just stopped." She looked comfortable. "I tell you no and you get it. No means no." She came in for a kiss on the cheek.
I thought back to my friend Marcus and tensed up a bit.
"There is a great caveat in the male female dynamic when it comes to the word no," I said quickly backing away. "I like to stay on the side of caution. Most guys think of it as a challenge. I think of it as a definitive statement. I understand the definition of the word no."
"Good. I like that. Maybe next time..."
"Oh there won't be a next time."
"What do you mean?"
I remember the look on Marcus's face when the police showed up at his parent's house to ask him a few questions about his last date.
"The good thing about No is that I honor the word. I don't push. I don't beg. I don't plead. I respect your decision. But to me no doesn't just mean no. It means never.
"It means we can still be friends. I have handshakes and hugs for you but this situation? This here? This won't happen again."
"What the fuck?!?" She said. The comfortable look was gone from her face. "I tell you no and then you tell me this will never happen?!? Who the fuck do you think you are?" I have never seen a woman more angry than when I have said no to her or I have respected her no.
I remember Marcus sitting on his couch head down in front of his parents recounting the story of his hook up. I remember the state trooper writing everything down while he occasionally looked at his audio recorder to make sure it was still taping.
I remember the trooper noticing discrepancies in the opposing parties statements. He let Marcus know he would have to go back and look at the situation. He also let Marcus know even if the prosecutor didn't press charges right away he had three years to change his mind.
I remember being asked to leave while he talked with his family about what their next moves were. I remember my friend's voice break with tears just before the door shut.
"Seriously, who do you think you are?"
I took a deep breath. I thought about the irony of this whole thing. She was the one who said no. I abided by her wishes. This wasn't a game to me. No doesn't just mean no. No means never. I thought she was going to hit me.
"I'm just some guy who wants to make sure there's no doubt in the future. You said no and I'm abiding by that no. I didn't question your request to stop. I ask that you have the decency not to pursue this any further. When you're less angry this will make sense. You're welcome to stay and talk if you want but that's about as far as it's going to go."
She slammed the door on her way out without saying good-bye.
"I'm fine," I told myself as I took a deep breath and felt the blood return to the rest of my body.
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