Day 97 - I Say Yes

     This is not my favorite bar.  She is not my favorite bartender, but she's growing on me.  Sometime mid hibernation it hit me that it might not be in my best interest to sleep with a bartender who was best friends with our HR person.

     Initially it seemed like a good idea.  I would be the diligent hard working guy at the job and the charming but not overly attentive customer at the bar.  My HR person would put in a good word for me and I would tip well enough to stay on her radar.  Anything sounds like a good idea when you are knee deep in Tequila.

     The cold reality hit me one night before I went to sleep.  Did I want two people who saw different aspects of my life to really talk?  True, due to work restrictions, they weren't really supposed to talk BUT they were best friends.  Everyone knows that best friends talk.  Most people can't keep secrets to save their lives.

     How many times have you heard or even said, "Look I'm not supposed to say anything BUT..." and then watched while the world fell to shit?

     Unlike most, I made the decision to keep my work life separate from the office life.  It's not like I would have a relationship with anyone in the office but dating the best friend of someone you work with is just as bad.  Dating the best friend of someone who could fire you is even worse.

     I had visions of an argument happening one morning before work.  I would be the man and put my foot down and she, being tired from getting home at three in the morning, would finally say 'You know what, you're right.'  I would then get to the office with a bit of a slick smile on my face only to realize that my badge doesn't work anymore.

     Have I given up completely on hooking up with my favorite bartender?  Yes and no. I say no because quitters never win.  

     I say yes because the woman I should have stayed with ten years ago has reappeared.  I say yes because after being angry at the world for almost 20 years I am at peace.  I say yes because I have an understanding of the good and I will share it with you soon.  I say yes because it is time to move forward and make the final step to becoming the man I should be; the man my father would be proud of.  I say yes because I am close to being the man she deserves.

     With that said, I am not at my favorite bar because that would distract me from the end game.  This is not my favorite bar.  She is not my favorite bartender, but she's growing on me.