228

     228.

     I just stared at my phone.  The mortgage was due.  The electric bill was due.  The gas bill was due.  The phone bill was due.  The gas tank was almost bone dry.

     228.

     My schedule was empty so I called out for the day.  This was a problem that required my immediate attention.  Home office was three hours behind so I had to wait until Noon to find out exactly what had gone wrong.

     The cell had been good that morning.  It must have known that the plan was to get paid, clear the major bills then FINALLY hit the local store.  There was a major announcement. The latest and greatest version was about to debut so of course there was a HUGE sale.

     228.

     There was a choice now.  Get the updated version of my current phone, get the latest and greatest phone, or get last year’s latest and greatest.  Unfortunately none of my old cases would fit any of the new phones.  They were all larger.  Even the updated version of my current phone looked different, felt different, and just was different.

     228.

     None of that really mattered.  The phone bill was due.  The gas bill was due.  The electric bill was due.  The mortgage was due. The gas tank was bone dry.  Over the last 19 years the great claim from every employer ended with the phrase “and if you do this you’ll be making $100k within the next 2 years, easy.”

     I was making somebody $100k just not me.  My reserves had dipped over the last few years.  There was a little bit here for the mortgage.  There was a little bit there for necessary office costs.  There was a little bit here for new brakes.  There were little pieces chipping away.  It was ok because I knew the windfall would fix it all.

     The last time things were this tight was when my father passed away.  The year after he died I drank my way through a multitude of local bars, disappeared to California for a short time, and totaled two cars in 8 weeks.

     Back then I was quietly giving Paris a run for her money but my self destruction was more psychological and less public.

     228.

     Since the last pay period there had been 1,100 miles logged in the car, 18 hours on the road, 100 hours in office, some where between 350 to 600 phone calls, many in person meetings, and two major deals postponed for 4 months.  After all that time and effort my direct deposit just stared back at me.

    $228. 

     There had to be a zero missing from the back of the number or a one missing from in front of it.  There had to be because if there wasn’t then nothing made sense.

     At 12:05 pm east coast time the home office payroll division explained to me that these were the quarterly fees.  The fees had just hit at an awkward time.  The stipend from the company ended just after the last quarter fees hit.  They were actually surprised someone hadn’t let me know I would be taking the hit this time.

     The phone rolled off my fingertips and slipped into the cradle.  This call required the home phone. Even though it had been good all morning, I wasn’t taking a chance that the cell would drop service.

     The sunlight danced gently across the living room floor.  The shadows from the panes in the glass slowly moved from the couch, to the coffee table, to the ottoman across the room.

     My current situation had been updated.  My immediate future looked different, felt different, and just was different.  I had been looking for a reason to make a change.  I had been looking for a sign to get off my ass and get things done.  I now had 228.