53 - Well Swill

     "I hate this why can't we just smoke at the bar," said Paris sitting down
at the patio table.  "Don't these fucking people know what my needs are?  I need
to see the selection.  I don't want the well swill."  I like hanging with Paris.
She's so subtle.
     "At least it's a nice day."  She said slamming her purse down on the table
and lighting her cigarette.  She had a little gift bag with her.
     "Good to see you too, kiddo."  I said taking out an American Spirit yellow.
     She looked at my face and tilted her head.  "Nice you took my advice. Ten
pounds?"
     I stood up, held my arms out, and did a little spin.  "Thirty.  Thirty
pounds, pretty girl."
     "Handsome."
     "Thank you," I said blowing the smoke into the wind.  "Let the hunting
begin."
     "Hunting?"
     "Hunting.  It's time to look for some super summer sex."
     "It's funny you mention that.  I have something for you," she said sliding
the little black to me.  "Happy birthday."
     I opened the bag and my cigarette almost fell into my lap.
     "'How To Succeed With Women'?!?  What the hell is this?"
     "Oh just fucking say thank you!  At least I got you something for your
birthday."
     "P, my birthday is in April."  I exhaled, flicking the ash on to the brick
patio.
     "That's not my fault.  Now where's our Goddamn waitress."
     "Don't worry I got you.  Paris Is Burning.  Now really, 'How To Succeed
With Women'?!?  What the hell is this?"
     "Is there a delayed echo out here?"
     "PARIS!"
     "Alright," she said putting out her cigarette.  "You try too hard."
     "What?"
     "You try too hard.  Remember when you broke up with that twenty year old.."
     "She's twenty-one," I corrected her while I flipped through the chapter
heads."
     "Whatever.  You asked me what was wrong with you.  Other than being fat -
and yes you were fat at the time - you try too hard to make a first impression.
You need to relax and let it flow.  You can tell you are trying that's not
attractive."
     The waitress finally showed up with our drinks.  I sat back and let Paris's
words sink in.  As I sat up I caught the waitress looking just a little too
long.
     "Can I get you anything else?"
     "No we're all set,"  I said blowing the smoke away from her.  "Thank you."
     "Nice."  Said Paris.  "Very nice.  She had a slight interest and you
acknowledged it.  That's all you need."
     "I hardly noticed her.  I didn't say anything until..."
     "The right time." she finished.  "You've been out of the game for a while.
Think of this as spring training.  You already know how to play this is
just...just  sharpening your skills.  It's funny as all hell too.  I think
you'll like it"
     I just looked at my Grey Goose and Red Bull.  The smoke rolled over my hand
and across the table.  I realized that this was the first time Paris and I had
had anything resembling a heart to heart.  In her own little way she was telling
me she was worried about me.
     "Look," she said "I know you can see the selection that's out there.  I
just don't want you to get stuck with the well swill."